It promised so much, didn’t it? Friends, fun, entertainment. And while it certainly has given us a lot, it’s taken a lot away too. Maybe too much, in fact...

Let me explain…
It’s a little ironic that, as social media pushes the virtual friend count to new heights, the culture as a whole is getting ever more isolated. Researchers say that we have fewer close confidants outside family than ever before. One in four have no confidants at all. A recent study reported that 75 percent of college students have lower empathy than their peers did 30 years ago, which isn’t going to boost the social cause; neither will a spike in students’ narcissism over that same period, documented in these researches.

Social media may appear to make our lives easier, but at the same time it complicates them. Studies show that the pressure of having to present oneself in a way that is acceptable to online friends increases stress levels. The fact that we have to worry about how we appear to “everyone” in cyber-society adds unnecessary stress to our lives. Simultaneously, we have far more information accessible to us than we’re programmed to have. Knowing too much about everything going on in the world through constant access to cyber reports requires us to be involved in it. We become seemingly too busy caring about the people we hardly know inside these machines; then we can no longer balance worrying about things with which we should be concerned, such as real-life relationships, skills, and (probably the most unfortunate) ourselves.

Do you stress out when you have no mobile reception? Do you lose the plot when your Internet goes down? Do you feel lonely when you check your device and there are no posts, tweets, links or likes?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be suffering from what psychologist Dr Jim Daley terms “Disconnectivity Anxiety”. In an article in The Huffing-ton Post, Daley talks about the by-products of our “gotta be connected 24/7” culture. “Disconnectivity Anxiety (DA) is a persistent and unpleasant condition characterised by worry and unease caused by periods of technological disconnection from others,” he says.

While not an official psychiatric disorder, Daley sees it as a growing problem that “typically presents itself during a breakdown in the technology that makes communication instantaneous and continuous, and when someone else doesn’t respond immediately. “DA is associated with symptoms of worry, negative emotions such as fear, anger, frustration, and despair, and physical distress. The only short-term relief is restoration of the connection.”

Online communication frequently takes the place of real life. They become dependent on the technology and forget how to socialize in face to-face. Back in the day computer did not exist; they only used telephone to communicate with other people. People used to live a simple life and had more time for their family and friends. What happened to our generation right now? Why is our society, both young and old generations, so addicted to technology?

There is no doubt that socal media can be very helpful for work and staying in contact with loved ones who live all over the world -- but do we have connected disconnectivity? Do we need to start putting down the devices and stop obsessing about how many likes our most recent post attracted, how many comments we get on our blogs, or how many friends we have on Facebook? Are we so busy taking photos and uploading them of our amazing holidays, meals and experiences for everyone else to see, that we’re actually missing the moment ourselves?

Technology is not going to suddenly disappear, nor is the family. The family unit, like technology, is constantly changing. In the end, it is the role of the parent or primary caregiver to moderate how much technology is allowed to permeate the core of family communication. Family communication will not be adversely affected by technology if it is monitored and controlled.

Writing this I am staying at an Elite Makadi Bay Resort on the Red Sea. My husband and I have chosen for there to be no internet reception in our rooms and apart from not being able to send this article through on time, getting off the grid has been fantastic for the family. Everyone is talking and communicating and taking in the beautiful environment around us, rather than burying their heads in digital devices. When you ‘look up’ it is amazing how much more you actually notice in the world around you, and how rich some of our experiences can be.

No matter how many photos we capture or clever tweets we publish, nothing can take the place of physical experience. The best applied filter can’t replace the feeling you get when you actually sink your toes into the sand or stand in awe of a setting sun. No video clip can adequately convey your favorite song performed by your favorite band in a live setting. No amount of likes can substitute for the feel of a newborn’s silky skin or the perfect fit of a strong hand in your own.

Sometimes, words and pictures just aren’t enough. Life is meant to be lived and savored. And social media keeps us from doing just that. We miss the expression on our friend’s face -- the very thing they’re not telling us -- because we’re so busy tinkering with our phones. We miss the magic of ordinary moments -- best experienced with others.

So, the next time you reach a big milestone? Before hitting “publish” on Facebook, choose instead to call your sister/best friend. Tell her how the big moment made you feel. Give her the gift of sharing your joy and your tears. Invite her into your story. Deliberately save some moments. Don’t publicly share every facet of your life. Instead, let’s vow to keep some things just between those that “truly” care…

By: Dahlia Nassar